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PROWRITE

WRITING SERVICES CC

MEMORIES OF A HOME – MOVING ON

5th October 2021 By Suzanne Brenner

For some people, a house is just a convenience where they sleep at night. Not for us. In 1999, my husband and I were charmed by a house in Melville, a lively suburb in Johannesburg. It has been our home for 22 years.

The doors to my office…

Born in Durban, I headed for London as soon as I finished university and I loved every minute there. I planned to make it home, but back in South Africa to visit my parents, fate intervened and I ended up in Cape Town for a year, which heralded my return to this country.

Professional ambition and my love of large cities saw me move to Johannesburg in the late 1970s, where I have been ever since. One of the first places I lived was in 6th Avenue, Melville, where I rented the upstairs of a property with a magnificent view of the Koppies and a spectacular experience of Johannesburg’s famous electric storms. That was the beginning of a love affair with the area, which I put on hold when I bought my first house elsewhere.

The return to Melville was largely motivated by wanting somewhere fitting for our housekeeper, Margaret, and her family, to live. When I showed her the cottage designed by architect Kate Otten, she burst into tears.

Family matters…

My stepson, who came to live with us when he was 14, liked the buzz in Melville and gave it his thumbs up. Given the choice of living in the main house or the bedsit next to the cottage, he unsurprisingly chose to be outside the main house, where he lived until he moved to his own place (give or take a gap year in the UK and studies there and Australia) and this time the tears were mine, but of course, I understood.

The garden has always given us immense pleasure.

Sadly, Margaret’s husband died ahead of his time and we mourned his loss but life went on and our house was a haven for us all.

Our lives were very different in the days and months and years before Covid when we more or less had an open-door policy for our large circle of friends.

There was seldom a weekend without friends descending for a braai…

At that stage, I was a senior TV producer at SABC and the proximity to work appealed to me as did Melville’s trendy restaurants and the quaint shops and the camaraderie of the people who lived in and visited Melville. Some of Joburg’s most interesting characters lived or hung out here – artists, writers, performers, TV and radio producers and academics. Melville was also one of the most diverse suburbs, a racially mixed and harmonious place to live even before South Africa became a democracy. In short, it was the place to be and I knew pretty much everybody in the neighbourhood.

Birds just love this bath…
With a very strict mother overseeing them, the girls thrived in their schools and Margaret’s younger daughter received a bursary to attend Parktown Girls. Later she was awarded a scholarship for her university years by Deloitte & Touche South Africa. With the option of attending any university in the country and staying in digs or residence, she chose UJ and to remain at home with us in Melville.

A conscientious, hard-working child, she made us all proud by achieving distinctions throughout school and university. She’s been abroad several times and now has a well-paid job with a leading bank.

None of Margaret and her late husband’s three children is a domestic (their son, more than 10 years older than his sisters, left our home some years before) and so the cycle has been broken. Their parents and we were proud of their progress in their chosen professional fields. We also had another generation join us one New Year’s Day when Margaret’s older daughter gave birth to a girl who added even more pleasure to our lives.

A glossy starling takes a dip…
Kids stuff…
Just over two years ago, Margaret’s younger daughter – who effectively spent her whole life with us before moving on – sat me down and shared the news that she had found a place where she and her sister and their young charge were going to live. She said that as her sister was 30 and she was close, it was time to find their independence. There were tears again, mine, but of course, I understood.

We were fortunate that my stepson and the girls stayed as long as they did. I worried about Margaret being lonely but she had been talking about retirement for a couple of years although neither of us spoke seriously about the dreaded subject. We made a cursory attempt to find someone else with Margaret interviewing three potential replacements who concluded we were inseparable.

Mothers Day 2019

Luckily Margaret’s brother always joined her for Christmas – as he did in 2019 – and my suggestion that he stay on was well-taken and he was still present when Covid brought lockdown to our household in March last year. My husband, Margaret and her brother and I lived contentedly here until Christmas last year when Margaret decided that for the festive season they were going to the house she’d inherited from her husband – where the four of us had recently been to check on it. I responded that it was time for her to live in her beautiful home, time for retirement. She protested she couldn’t leave us “alone” but my mind was made up and when the day came to say adieu, we all cried copious tears.

The cottages side by side…

For Margaret and me, it had been 40+ years together without so much as an argument and it was a wrench to part ways. She and I phone each other regularly and she still says how much she misses us, Melville and her friends in the area, and her absence is sorely felt.

The garden is full of surprises…

It was an adjustment for my husband and me to face the reality of our extended family going their ways and for us to adapt to our property in these Covid times. We realised that we too would have to move on and embark upon a new chapter in our lives.

In winter, we gathered close to the fire…

Our house was a stumbling block because we could barely imagine living anywhere else. In winter, a wood-burning fireplace kept us cosy and in summer our beautiful garden flourished. We had wild Brazilian cherries, granadillas, lemons and an abundance of figs for green fig preserve, and the pickings from our scented flower garden were arranged in most rooms while also attracting birds and bees.

A bumper year of sweet peas…
Three years ago we gave it a facelift and then we added solar energy and have lived and worked without interruption ever since.
Dogs were always in the picture…
Can one have a relationship with bricks and mortar? What is the making of a home? For us, it has been so many things but ultimately our house has been filled with the love and contentment of two families who co-depended on each other for decades. Under separate roofs on the same property, we shared so much, including dogs that made their own choices about where they should live – sometimes it was the main house and sometimes it was the cottage.

We’ll be saying goodbye soon…
It will be hard leaving this home from home, which contains so much of our history, but now Cape Town is calling us where we both have family and at this time in our lives, we look forward to living close to them.
It will be another tearful occasion when we bid goodbye to this beautiful house but the new owners are in for a treat and while we will always think of it as “our house”, in making it their own, they will start creating their memories, which I hope are as happy as ours.

Filed Under: Autobiographical, Blogs & Features, Johannesburg, Melville News, Suzanne's World, Uncategorised

Comments

  1. Pippa says

    5th October 2021 at 8:42 pm

    Fabulous memories. You’re lucky to have that. Not everybody does. I’m envious and oh so proud of you dear friend. And we never did get that cuppa together! Next time … xxx

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      6th October 2021 at 12:27 pm

      You’re right. One of these days. Sx

  2. Brother Melvin waiting to welcome Richard and you to Cape Town. says

    5th October 2021 at 11:33 pm

    Very moving.

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      6th October 2021 at 12:26 pm

      And talking of moving… hopefully the dates will soon be forthcoming. Sx

  3. Carol brown says

    6th October 2021 at 7:22 am

    Lovely article Suzanne and much resonates with me in our move to Melville. I do hope to see you before you move on. Much love

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      6th October 2021 at 12:25 pm

      Thanks, Carol. I tried calling a week ago but will try again. Sx

  4. Martin Thompson says

    6th October 2021 at 11:36 am

    Yes, it is always hard leaving a home as opposed to a house. I have been living in my ‘penthouse’ (really a top floor flat) in Hampstead for 15 years now and I love it. I dread the thought of ever having to leave. I have the whole of Hampstead Heath literally across the road and have made many lovely friends hereover the years. Good luck with your new home. Cape Town is, as you know, a special place too. If I wasn’t living here that wpuld be where I would want to live. Love.💕

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      6th October 2021 at 12:24 pm

      Thanks, Martin. Yes, Hampstead is a special environment and you fit in so well. Sx

  5. Jenny Hunter Blair says

    6th October 2021 at 1:11 pm

    Hello Suzanne,

    This is a lovely descriptive memoir of a lovely family home, garden and people ebbing and flowing in and out of your life. Well done.
    Sending you lots of good vibes for the move. I am sure you will have an exciting new life.

    Much love
    Jenny

  6. Mike Fauré says

    7th October 2021 at 7:35 pm

    Loved your story Suzanne. I wish you the best with your move to Cape Town – the city in which I was born and raised (Pinelands). Enjoy – I’m sure you will!

    Sent from my iPad

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      8th October 2021 at 2:31 pm

      Many thanks, Mike. Good to hear from you.

  7. Vanessa Solomon says

    9th October 2021 at 6:52 pm

    Beautiful my friend. I wish you as much happiness in the Cape.
    Hopefully will see you there sometime in the future. Hugs

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      10th October 2021 at 11:25 am

      Thanks, Nessa, Look forward to seeing you there.

  8. Maryanne says

    10th October 2021 at 7:01 am

    What a lovely tribute to house, home and its people. You will miss Melville and Johannesburg but Cape Town with all its vagaries(that wind!) is waiting to receive you.
    Good luck with the move and see you at the foot of Table mountain!

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      10th October 2021 at 11:31 am

      Thanks, Maryanne. Yes, at the foot of the mountain sounds diplomatic :-).

  9. Sarah says

    13th October 2021 at 6:23 am

    It won’t be the same without you round the corner! But we will chat lots!

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      15th October 2021 at 1:57 pm

      I will miss you.

  10. Anne Williams says

    19th October 2021 at 8:54 am

    Very touching Suzanne – your love for your home and families, reached me. A big move indeed with all the threads of emotion, memory and sentiment, bound up in it. We will miss hearing from you on social media, and seeing you & Richard in the area … you’re part of the village! But a lovely city awaits you and know you’ll soon be making inroads and new memories there – all the very best xx

    • Suzanne Brenner says

      21st October 2021 at 7:53 pm

      Thank you for your very kind words, Anne. Hope to see you in the Cape some time. Love to you and Gary.

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